confuseddaily

It’s a weird time in my life, getting older, unsure of myself, weepy and not sure what the hell is going on. Scared of what’s ahead and what’s not ahead. Hate being alone and hate being with people. Its a no win situation.

I miss being held, being kissed, being loved and being made love to. I miss not having him near me to play with, to fight with and to make up with.

Most of all I hate when someone says I am so strong and thinks that I can handle anything. They act like I have no feelings and can just brush things off but I can’t and lately seems like all I do is cry, all alone with no one even having a clue about what I feel and who I really am.

He says come on over then he says no don’t come til the house is sold, what if the house doesn’t sell, he goes quiet like I have no choice but to stay here until it does.He doesn’t want me to quit my job, he wants me to stay until everything is figured out, while he lives his life free of the responsibilities and free of me.  Wish I knew what to do, wish I knew what to do……………………….

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